I swear, as the saying goes, when it rains it pours!!
I would like to clarify ONE thing that was mentioned in the article. "If I had to choose between being conceived with half my identity and half my kinship deliberately denied from me for eternity - or never being born - I'd choose never being born". This comment was taken very much out of context from a blog post for last year. In the rest of the post I elaborated on the fact that if I had never been born there would be no loss as I would have never existed. And there is a difference between never being born and never having existed - the former assumes that a loss would occur, whereas the latter assumes none of that.
Also, as I pointed out during my interview (which sadly was not mentioned) is that while blogging that I may have over-exaggerated. To say that I am not grateful or happy with my current life is a terribly untrue. My point is that the loss associated with being donor conceived is something that I will carry for the rest of my life, and that to deliberately create a human being with that loss is unethical. It does not mean I'm suicidal or hate my parents or my life.
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In other news....
The DNA database (future home will be at http://www.donorconceptiondna.org) that Damian Adams and I are creating is nearing completion!! Thanks to the amazing talents of John Avitabile (a CS professor and donor conceived adult), who is creating the framework database that will store and analyze member's results and compare their DNA to all other members of the database - our dream is becoming a reality! We couldn't have done this project without you John!!!
For more information about the DNA database please refer to: "Donor Offspring DNA Database - UPDATE!"
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ALSO......
The Federal Inquiry into Donor Conception in Australia (attempting to get retrospective access to donor records for ALL offspring) is still accepting submissions - I believe the date has been extended until August 30th. You do NOT have to be an Australian citizen or donor-conceived to submit!! A plea for submissions by Christine Whipp was posted to PCVAI:
I would just like to add that at first glance, Caroline Lorbach's request for members of the PCVAI to send a submission on donor conception to a Federal Inquiry in another country sounds like quite a tall order, especially for anyone who is unaccustomed to writing about their feelings and experiences of donor conception, or on the topic in general.
By the same token it is all too easy to dismiss what happens elsewhere, under the auspices of foreign governments, as irrelevant to our own lives but what is happening in Australia today could be happening in our own back yards in a few years time. With enough support, Australia might just be able to pass a law giving retrospective access to donor information to all Australian donor offspring, regardless of which State they were conceived or when they were born. This would set a hugely important legal precedent to give leverage to the voices of donor conceived people and their supporters in other countries.
Making a submission to the Federal Inquiry is no where near as onerous as it first sounds. In the time it takes to pop into Starbucks and drink a coffee, any PCVAI member could visit the Donor Conception Support Group Website (www.dcsg.org.au), follow the links and make a submission to the Federal Inquiry using a pro forma letter that can be altered to suit individual experiences. [You might want to change the word 'donor' to biological father, for example and add a personal sentence or two.] It can be as simple and painless as that, or you could start from scratch and write whatever you felt appropriate if you had the time and inclination. You can even submit your response to the Inquiry in complete anonymity.
Anyone here can make a short submission supporting retrospectivity. It will only take five minutes of your time, but in the long run it could prove to be five minutes very well spent.
If you've got time for a coffee this weekend, give it a go.
This is the first legislation in the WORLD that is dealing with records and anonymity of donor conceived persons ALREADY conceived!!! Please help the Aussies to begin the daunting task of changing these laws so that the rest of the world may eventually follow!
1 comment:
Read of your blog on MSNBC. It is amazing to me how many of your questions were reflected in my husband, an adoptee -- and in me. It became very important when he went into cardiac arrest in his late 30s and the doctors asked about heart history in his family. We realized that not only for him, but for our children -- we did not know. And laws were in place to keep us from finding out. Not much has changed in the intervening 30 years, except persistent research reunited him with his birth family (and some additions) -- except for his father who died at 59 from a heart attack. Please continue sharing your story. We all need to understand in greater detail the links between parents and children. Thank you for your time.
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